It was a lucky day.
I woke up this morning and went to Kohl's. I got a great parking space, the third space in the row by one of the doors. I tried on five tops, and one after another they fit (!) perfectly and were just what I needed.
I bought the most delicious grilled cheese with tomato basil soup. I put it aside to eat it after I make my awesome pick up of three vanity lights that I found on Woodlands Online. I'm still pretty sure I paid just a third of what they were worth. Next to the house where I made the pick up, they were having a garage sale. And what? Only baby stuff left? I scored a sweet deal on a diaper genie. I was so excited, this was my first official baby purchase.
Then Jenn called me.
It was a terrifying day.
She said she had some "disconcerting news." Her and Michael were on their way to the ER. She was bleeding bright red blood. I made it home and sobbed in my car. I froze. My neighbor Stacey came over to help me. I couldn't stop crying and kept thinking "things aren't supposed to be happening like this!" I was just certain it was a miscarriage. I had already played the scenario in my head. Marc got home and we met Jenn and Michael in the Emergency Room. I know I must have looked panicked. Marc and I went out into the hall while Jenn changed into a hospital gown. I was crying again. Talking helped. Soon, I went with Jenn to the ultrasound room.
It was a miraculous day.
The ultrasound revealed that baby was fine. He/ she moved. I was relieved. We could see the heart flutter, and this time a flutter at the umbilical cord. Baby was healthy, growing. It had been five days since our last ultrasound and this time a spinal cord was evident. I swear he (she) was sucking its thumb.
Marc and I left soon after. The doctor said everything looked good, and we will be going to our regular OB on Monday to follow up.
It was a blessed day.
Any day, things can change in an instant. We have no idea how fragile life is, and how abundantly blessed each and every one of us is. Our God is holding our lives in His hands. I don't want to ever forget this. He blesses us in small ways, like my finding a diaper genie (!), but above all, he blesses us in large ways, like sustaining and growing the life of a tiny baby in the womb. I want to have a grateful heart... toward God, toward our surrogate Jenn, toward my friends who prayed, and toward the nurses who helped us. Toward my husband who calmed me, and to my neighbor for being there. I want to be grateful to the God who fills me... with joy and peace, so that I may overflow with hope.
My friend Karen sent this to me today:
"May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13